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    FC Barcelona News: 16 May 2026; Preparations begin for Real Betis, Barça meet with João Pedro’s agent

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Everton 0-3 Tottenham: Player ratings to the theme of spooky football player positions

October 27, 2025
in Tottenham Hotspur
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I’m undecided what number of Tottenham Hotspur followers went into Sunday’s match on the Hill Dickinson stadium — nonetheless with the “new stadium odor” — with a lot confidence. I actually didn’t have a lot. Everton have been undefeated at their new floor and have been enjoying fairly first rate below David Moyes this season, and Jack Grealish has been one thing of a revelation for them.

So whereas the soccer yesterday made me need to rinse my eyes out with bleach at occasions, I’m actually not going to quibble with a 3-0 shutout win, even when Spurs had a 2-0 halftime lead with zero open play photographs. And even if you happen to settle for the “unhealthy soccer/good win” framing, there have been undoubtedly some good performances in there. That’s why you’re right here, proper?

Anyway, it’s virtually Halloween, so how a couple of scary season theme? Nicely, right here you go. Listed below are your Tottenham Hotspur participant rankings to the theme of spooky soccer participant positions, crowdsourced by the Spurs author’s room and Bluesky.

5 stars: Flankenstein’s Monster

Micky van de Ven (Group — 5.0): Should you’re a central defender and also you rating a brace in a soccer match, you get 5 stars. It truly is simply that straightforward.

Guglielmo Vicario (Group — 4.5): Holy CRAP, Vic! Some unbelievable response saves on this one together with a one-handed cease on a Beto overhead kick he made whereas he was within the technique of falling on his ass. A bit of wonky on corners, however in any other case stable as a rock.

Kevin Danso (Group — 4.0): I’m beginning to come round to the conclusion that we’re extremely lucky to have a 3rd CB pretty much as good as Kevin Danso. Not flashy however stable on the again, not often let anybody previous him, and an aerial presence. Spurs’ greatest third CB since prime Eric Dier?

Pedro Porro (Group — 4.0): Put that wand of a leg to good use with a pinpoint supply for Micky’s second objective. Good on each side of the ball with a number of key blocks and saved Jack Grealish quiet all night time — there’s a brand new warden within the Djed Spence Penitentiary.

Pape Sarr (Group — 4.0): Sarr Man was actually magic on the ball on Sunday, popping up on the proper time to faucet house Spurs’ third objective. He’s had form of a tough go of it currently, so it’s good to see him doing good issues in a Frank midfield that I don’t suppose actually fits his expertise.

Thomas Frank (Group — 4.0): Spurs gained so he will get a very good score. That’s how this works, proper?

Joao Palhinha (Group — 4.0): This was really the form of match Palhinha was lab-grown for: gutsy, gritty, ugly, and moist. Actually locked down effectively defensively however had a few hospital ball passes — he’s by no means beating the allegations.

Rodrigo Bentancur (Group — 4.0): Assisted Micky’s first objective and relished the chaosball-destroyer function on this one. Nonetheless, was positionally wayward at occasions and I nonetheless suppose he wants some hypnotherapy to get his pre-injury passing vary again.

Mohammed Kudus (Group — 3.5): Sure, I checked the spelling. Direct, dribbly, and harmful, even when Spurs barely generated any precise possibilities till late within the match. Annoyed at occasions along with his closing ball, however that’s a) regular and b) most likely credit score to Everton’s protection.

Djed Spence (Group — 3.5): As I mentioned within the match thread, there have been a couple of safety lapses within the Spence Penitentiary early on in opposition to Ndiaye, who to be truthful is so much to deal with. That mentioned, if you happen to’re going to exude lock-down cornerback vitality on social media you’re gonna should deliver it in each match.

Brennan Johnson (Group — 3.0): In all probability one among BJ’s higher video games in what appears like eternally, although mockingly I feel he was put within the match principally to defend Grealish. And he did that.

Randal Kolo Muani (Group — 3.0): Lastly, an opportunity to essentially consider RKM by way of prolonged minutes! The reply: not unhealthy. Extra energetic on the ball than Richarlison, has higher imaginative and prescient proper now than Tel. I’d like my strikers to truly, y’know, shoot, however he presents various things to our different strikers in the mean time. Let’s see extra.

Lucas Bergvall (Group — 3.5): He ran round, did stuff, and didn’t screw something up. My #evaluation is that he was nice.

Richarlison (Group — 3.5): A bit of higher than in current matches. Thumped a rocket shot level clean that was saved and held the ball up decently. I nonetheless marvel if he’s carrying a minor damage.

2.5 stars: Centaur Midfielder

Xavi Simons (Group — 3.0): He’s not clicking but. He’s additionally not receiving a lot of the ball. It’ll come. Endurance, grasshopper.

No Tottenham Hotspur gamers have been as unhealthy as this pun. Significantly.

Vlad the Lad Memorial Non-Score



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European football: Kane uncorks title party with hat-trick; Lewandowski to leave Barça | European club football

European football: Kane uncorks title party with hat-trick; Lewandowski to leave Barça | European club football

May 16, 2026
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